Advice On How To Make A Relationship Work

by Speidumb

posted on 07/08/2009

Finding someone you would like to be in a relationship is hard work. After all of the flirting, calling, texting back and forth, and the ever scary "first date," you have a lot invested in making a relationship work out. If you want to keep things going past those first few weeks of whirlwind fun, it's important to understand one thing.

"Guys are dumb & girls are mean."

Almost all relationship problems can be boiled down to the basic premise of "Guys are dumb & girls are mean." Now, before you go thinking, "I'm not mean" or "I'm not dumb," I want you to know that in fact, you are. The sooner you realize that you fall into one of these categories, the easier your relationships will be. Lets look at a common example

Example: A guy and girl have been dating for a while, and one day she finds out he is cheating on her with her best friend. Why, you may ask? Well, it's a combination of things. If she is perfect (which she probably isn't), then it's because he's dumb. Why else would he make the stupid decision if she was the perfect girlfriend? Now, the other reason may be that she thinks she's perfect, but she's really driving him crazy. "She's a psycho," he thinks. Her mean actions cause him to act stupidly, and we're back at our example.

But, if guys are dumb and girls are mean, how can there be any hope for us at all?

Ah, here lies the problem. If guys are all idiots bent upon ruining everything that is good without even knowing it, and girls are all witches set upon destroying all that is pure and good, what hope is there? The answer is simple - Communication.

Admitting to yourself that you're dumb or mean is the first step. The second is much harder, because it requires you to pop the little bubble of perfection that you've worked so hard to set up. You have to talk to your significant other and tell them that you are dumb or mean, then help them to realize that they are the other. Once this conversation is over, you're on equal ground, you have a base from which forgiveness for stupid and mean stuff can occur.

Another example: Guy and girl are dating, guy totally spaces out girl's birthday (anniversary, trip to the mall, etc.) Once they both know that he's dumb, it's natural, and sometimes he forgets stuff, it's much easier for him to go to her and say "I'm sorry, I'm dumb (like we talked about), can you forgive me?"

90% of all relationship problems can be solved this way. The other 10% are usually serious issues that require lots of time talking about what is really going on, though most of the time the root issue is still that the guy is dumb and/or the girl is mean.

So take heart! It takes work, but you too can have a lasting relationship. Just don't be dumb (or mean) and it'll all work out ok.

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