Advice On How To Stop Being A Perfectionist

by hanamigo

posted on 09/26/2009

There are a few positive aspects to being a perfectionist, but I've found out that they aren't nearly enough to make up for all of the problems that being a perfectionist cause. I love being able to do a really good job and doing my best, but the return is disappointing compared to the effort I've put towards something. It's like I'm never satisfied. Instead, I've learned to put an end to my perfectionist habits, and here are some ways that you can, too.

There's No Such Thing as Perfect
The first thing that you must do in order to break this habit is to realize that there's no such thing as perfect. People are flawed beings, and the things that we touch and create are essentially flawed as well.

We're human, not robots, and we're not gods, either, so how could we possibly live up to those standards? We can't. Our quest for perfection is a fruitless one, and it's often very stressful. Perfectionism leads to us pursuing one thing alone while we lose sight of what's truly important.

Be Satisfied with Your Best
You may think that you're getting a lot done, but perfectionism actually interferes with true productivity. There's no sense in obsessing over a meaningless standard. Just do your best. That's usually the best policy.

You're underestimating yourself if you think that your best isn't good enough. If you do everything that you can, then you've done your best. Try to be satisfied with that.

When you know that you've done your best, you'll feel a sense of accomplishment that you most likely would never feel if you were working towards perfection. The only feelings that accompany perfectionism are a lack of satisfaction, a feeling of being rushed, and the pressure to perform.

After you've done your best, you have this satisfaction, a sense of closure, that you've done everything that you could, and you can move on to the next project.

Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
If you're a perfectionist because you've been trying to compete with some other high achieving individual, you should stop. That's not healthy behavior. You don't have to compete with some else, and you shouldn't compare yourself to another person who appears to be successful.

Who knows what kind of pressure this person is under? You don't want to live your life like that. You won't always be around this person, but it's likely that you will end up comparing yourself to another person if you continue with your perfectionist ways.

You should try to accept that you are your own person and not like anyone else. There will always be a person who is better than you at what you do. That's okay. Don't make life into a race or competition. Just be yourself and learn to be comfortable with what you can do. There will always be limitations to your abilities. It's all a part of being human.

Learn to Be Lazy
One of the best ways that I've learned to keep my perfectionist side in check is to be lazy. In this case, laziness doesn't mean not doing anything; it simply means that I know when to give it a rest.

When I'm working on a project that I really care about, it's easy to become overzealous, and I want to get the best product as possible. Sometimes I will work and work until I can get something just right. Then reality sets in, and I realize how much time I've spent on the minor details.

Don't let the minor details overshadow the big things. This is when I let a little of my laziness take over because, as a polar opposite, it provides just the kind of balance that I need to stay productive.

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